Wednesday, November 25, 2009


Tomorrow is Jeff’s birthday.  He reminded me that his driver’s license expires this year, and though he wouldn’t pass the eye exam for driving, we went anyway because he needs current photo identification.  The lovely lady that waited on us quietly asked if he understood he would need to sign a form relinquishing his driving privileges.  Indeed, he did.

Jeff handled today’s encounter just like he’s handled this whole illness—with graciousness and humor.  He joked that maybe we should let him take just one more spin around the parking lot.  Jeff has a way of making people feel at ease.  When the ID form asked for “hair color,”  we chuckled a bit.  I wrote “red” because that’s what it was.  (He hasn’t had any for years.)  The clerk hesitatingly told us that the system would accept “bald” as an answer.  “Oh.  Well, ‘bald’ it is, then.”  ☺

I am so thankful for the grace that God has given my husband to accept this loss of independence.  It wasn’t gradual.  He really did not have time to adjust to the idea.  In July he was driving himself to and from radiation.  In August, I drove him to his chemotherapy appointment, and he never drove again after that. 

I just think his positive attitude is inspiring.  Right now, that’s just the way things are, and he accepts that. 

We really do have much to be thankful for, and we are counting our blessings.

May each of you have a blessed Thanksgiving!

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

I Believe, Therefore I Trust

(Originally posted on Jeff’s Caringbridge page)

Jeff finished his steroids this weekend.  He is able to sleep again finally, but the headaches and nausea are returning.  It's been a rough evening.

His skin is really showing the radiation damage now.  It is very red, and looks like it may blister.  Of course, that is adding to his discomfort.

Our boys started asking some very pointed questions after bedtime prayer tonight.  They are worried, but it provided a wonderful opportunity to review some of Jesus' miracles and talk about the power of God and our privilege to pray.

Are you facing anything right now that seems impossible?  I would encourage you to take some time to think about the power of God.  By him all things are and were created.  That idea gets me every time.  His creation is amazing--and yes, I believe it happened just as the Bible describes.  Just as I believe he raised the dead, and healed the sick and restored sight to the blind.  He is God!  And I believe he has the power to heal Jeff.  I don't know if that's part of His plan for us or not, but I believe it is possible, and I'm going to keep asking.

"Jesus said unto him, If thou canst believe, all things are possible to him that believeth." Mark 9:23

Still trusting,

Sunday, November 8, 2009


One of my favorite hymns is “He Giveth More Grace.”

He giveth more grace when the burdens grow greater;
He sendeth more strength when the labors increase;
To added affliction, he addeth his mercy;
To multiplied trials, his multiplied peace.

His love has no limit.
His grace has no measure.
His power has no boundary known unto men.
For out of his infinite riches in Jesus,
He giveth, and giveth, and giveth again.

When we have exhausted our store of endurance;
When our strength has failed e’er the day is half done;
When we reach the end of our hoarded resources,
Our Father’s full giving is only begun.

~~Annie Flint

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

What comes next?

Since we hadn’t heard back from the Cleveland Clinic, Jeff called this morning to get his blood work results.  Everything looks good in that regard.

Once his brain has had time to heal from the radiation, he will begin chemotherapy again.   It will involve the same method of administration (intrathecal aka “spinal” ), but Jeff’s doctor has decided to use a different drug.

We have another MRI appointment in December  and pray that those scans will show improvement.  In the meantime, Jeff will be resting.  He is extremely fatigued, and the steroids cause insomnia.   As I am sure you all have experienced, a good night’s rest can make a world of difference in your overall outlook.  Pray for restful sleep.